Memories

Erol watched BlackClan grow with happiness. The clan was slowly returning to the state a clan should be in. He watched Sunnyblade talking to Raggedflame. She had moved out of the Nursery 3 moons ago when their kits, Rapidpaw and Tinderpaw, had become apprentices. He started to pad towards his mate, nodding at Raggedflame. Raggedflame dipped his head and padded away. Erol smiled then looked at Sunnyblade.

"Life is pretty normal now."

Sunnyblade smiled.

"This is so much different then the BlackClan I remember, You've done a good job."

Sunnyblade seemed far away as she spoke, like she was somewhere else.

"Are you okay?"

She looked ay Erol again.

"I don't know... I always hated living in LakeClan cause I hated clan life. I was born a loner, and that's what I liked. Then when I was stolen... the old BlackClan was so different. Nothing like LakeClan. Though it was horrid, and Fierystar used me only for kits... I liked it there. I liked the thought of the danger and the difference. And now... BlackClan is becoming like LakeClan. I... it isn't me. My life isn't this."

Erol stood rooted to the spot. He didn't know what to think. He had done this all for her. Of course, it was StarClan's will, but if she had told him she didn't want it like this, he would've done it. He would have done anything for her. Finally he nosed her cheek.

"We can... We can leave. We can become loners."

Sunnyblade's eyes widened.

"You're the leader! You can't leave. And you're happy here. I wouldn't make you leave."

Erol looked down.

"How can I be happy knowing you aren't? I would do anything to make you happy. Even if it means handing my clan over to someone else."

Sunnyblade shook her head.

"We can't... We couldn't anyways. What about Rapidpaw and Tinderpaw? This is their home. The only home they've known. I couldn't take them away."

Erol sighed.

"They'd understand."

She shook her head.

"No... We're not leaving."

She looked at Erol, her eyes set. He sighed.

"Okay. I'm going to see how Icycurrent is doing. You want to come?"

Sunnyblade shook her head, her hard resolution dissolving. He licked her cheek before padding to the medicine cat den. Windingflame looked up then dipped his head. Erol smiled slightly before spotting the ginger tom and going over to him.

"Hey."

Icycurrent looked up and sighed, before resting his head back on his paws. He stared listlessly at the wall, his eyes dull. Erol closed his eyes, remembering what Sunnyblade had said, how her life isn't this. How it was the fierceness of the old BlackClan.

"Is this your life?"

Icycurrent looked at Erol, and Erol continued.

"This clan. This isn't your life. You grew up in a world of fierceness. It's who you are now. This, this clan is not enough for you. Sunnyblade said the same thing. She isn't happy here. She likes being a loner. She prefers a fierce and dangerous life over this one."

Icycurrent closed his eyes tightly.

"I miss it. I'm probably horrid to say that."

Erol shook his head.

"No. No you're not. I want to leave. With Sunnyblade. I want her to be happy, but she won't leave. If we leave, I want you to make this clan fierce. Make it a clan to be feared, but also make it be able to be an ally other clans can trust. Keep the clan happy, but have that dangerous spirit the clan has lost. Promise me that."

Icycurrent stayed still for a while, before nodding.

"Okay. I'll try."

Erol nodded.

"Now, to do that you can't be depressed. It's making you sick. You need to get better. Please try."

Before Icycurrent could answer Erol got up and padded away, his head low.